Practicing empathy can be difficult, because you have to step outside your comfort zone to understand someone else’s point of view. But it’s essential to exercising influence.
It’s how method actors move us to feel, think, or act differently — they deeply immerse themselves in their characters, trying on new ways of being and behaving. Sometimes their identity experiments are even part of the story line. During Tootsie, walking in the shoes of a woman had such a profound impact on Dustin Hoffman that, 30 years later, recalling his decision to make the film brought tears to his eyes in an interview with the American Film Institute.
Hoffman did some make-up tests to see if he would be believable as a woman. When he discovered that he could pass, but he wouldn’t be beautiful, he realized he had to do this project. As he explained to his wife: “I think I’m an interesting woman [as Dorothy Michaels]. And I know that if I met myself at a party, I wouldn’t talk to that character because she doesn’t fulfill physically the demands that we’re brought up to think women have to have in order for us to ask them out. … There’s too many interesting women I have not had the experience to know in this life because I’ve been brainwashed.” Empathy made Hoffman’s performance — and the film’s message — more convincing and powerful.
The same thing happens in business all the time. Whether you’re trying to get your team on board with a new way of working, asking investors to fund you, persuading customers to buy your product, or imploring the public to donate to your cause, your success depends on your ability to grasp the wants and needs of the people around you.
https://hbr.org/2015/05/to-win-people-over-speak-to-their-wants-and-needs
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